Why is tonight not like all the other nights? No wait, that’s a different Jewish holiday altogether, one where Jews across the world go full keto diet for a week. December 10th, was the first night of 2020’s Chanukah, or Hannukah with two N’s, or Hanukkah with two K’s. There’s truly no correct spelling for the Hebrew title of the Festival of Lights, as long as you don’t spell it with three K’s that is. That’s a bad editing move to say it lightly.
For the Torah story of the holiday and why it can relate to cannabis usage is easily explainable. Imagine a world where your stash is nearly as dry as the Negev Desert, yet through a miracle of almost divine proportion, you make a single joint last eight days. Yes, that is similarly the story of the Macabees and how they made their oil supplies last a miraculous eight days, enough time to storm their Seculid-occupied home of the Second Temple and rededicating the temple’s honor.
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In this case, I would imagine the Temple would be the rolling papers perhaps. Yet, I doubt my very Orthodox father of six kids would’ve let me consult with him on how to incorporate cannabis into such a special holiday. So I’ll be doing my own research on this story. And unlike evidence that Kenneth Copeland’s “judgment execution” on COVID 19 was successful, the evidence on cannabis and Chanukah being together is vast.
As is very NOT startling to cannabis consumers, particularly among my fellow Semites, there’s endless innovative and creative ways to include cannabis into the eight crazy nights. Although full disclosure, Bubbie and Zayda might not approve of a large number of these inclusions, but they’ll still love you regardless.
Because food is ultimately what every Jewish holiday that isn’t Yom Kippur revolves around, Hanukkah-celebrating consumers should be happy to know that Leafly released a cannabis-infused potato latke recipe in 2017. Made from fresh russet potatoes and with all the fixings and cooked in the delectable style that only your mother could master, each latke contains ideally about five milligrams of THC and goes perfectly with both sour cream or applesauce. As I try to be objective, I won’t be stating my opinion on the applesauce vs. sour cream debate, other than I’ve had many delicious latkes cooked mostly by Mama Kasoff herself that go well with both.
Leafly, a popular site for cannabis consumers of all varieties, has clearly done their research into Hannukah, as they also have an infused Sufganiyot recipe as well. More goyish-ly described as jelly donuts, the recipe utilizes Ruby’s infused sugar brand and all the classics that make Sufganiyot special, especially the raspberry jam.
Away from the kitchen, the innovative minds behind cannabis consumption piece engineering has made sure to incorporate the Festival of Lights’ into some of their designs. Featured in the 2017 Hey Alma article written by Arielle Kaplan, arguably the most famous Hanukkah-related piece, is the $400 glass wonder of the cannabis world, the Clear Menorah otherwise known as the Menorah Bong by historic Texas glass blowers GRAV. With eight bowls instead of one, a celebrating cannabis consumer could smoke one bowl on Night One, two bowls on Night Two, three bowls on Night Three and so on. Eight bowls out of this horizontal bong in one sitting may be quite a conquest, but it’s in the name of the holiday, so it’s permitted.
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Featured on Vice, cannabis artist Tony Greenhand teaches the viewers how to roll the most ambitious joint design ever rolled. One that puts the Pineapple Express-famous Cross Joint to shame, the design features six mini joints all connected to a larger middle candle, known as a shamash, and a frame constructed entirely of cannabis.
Also featured in Vice’s Munchies channel, comedian and self-described “Bad Jew” Eliot Glazer teaches how to make an infused gelt recipe. Commonly known more as gold chocolate coins, the gelt is an absolutely perfect combination with the dreidel of your choice. And if the next great hemp pioneer is reading this article, I personally challenge you to construct a dreidel entirely of hemp. I’ll even purchase it for Hannukah 2021. In fact, a use of cannabis as the prizes for dreidel games themselves could be quite the present.
Whether you refer to the holiday as Chronic-uh, Marijuanakah, Chanu-bis or any other pun combination of Hannukah and one of cannabis’ many aliases, it turns out that with a miniscule amount of Google research, one could find numerous ways to cleverly include cannabis into their celebration of the holiday commemorating among the greatest of miracles in the Jewish people’s history.